Friends! I come bearing GREAT NEWS! Sound the horns, light the signal fires, rattle your shields, and raise your glasses for today we emerge from the battlefield victorious! I had my PET scan last Monday to see where things stood. Going in, the last status was that the esophagus was clear, but there was that cluster of abdominal lymph nodes that were active and troublesome. I did another round of radiation and more chemotherapy and immunotherapy and then we went to Scotland and toured the Highlands for two weeks...when we returned, I had my scan and then we waited. On Friday, June 28th, two days after moving back down to our beloved mountain home, I got my results:
The abdominal cancer is "completely resolved." I'm still in a bit of shock. Writing that sentence is mind blowing. What does that mean? It means that there are no growing tumors, no cells dividing, no cancerous activity. It means that we have chased the enemy
from the battlefield. The esophagus is still clear. As of right now, there is no active cancerous activity in my body. I'm going to repeat that last sentence while grinning ear to ear (grin with me)...As of right now, there is no cancerous activity in my body.
This is incredible. Stage IV cancer in my esophagus and then my abdomen and right now (and always, if I have my way)...no activity. So what's next? I have an appointment with my doctor down here in WV and we'll determine the course of action, but it sounds like it'll be ongoing immunotherapy to make sure my body keeps the watchtowers manned so that the invaders do not return. But NO chemotherapy! No poisons coursing through me to combat the cancer. Immunotherapy does not come with the side effects that chemo does (at least for me - there are people who do suffer extreme ill effects of immunotherapy).
So, no, I will not be hanging my sword on the mantle. I will not be laying my shield in the corner. I will not be letting my guard down. Victory has been claimed, but I'd have to be a fool to think the danger doesn't lurk, that it cannot return to try and plague the land of my body. I am no fool.
I am, however, ecstatic. I am grateful. And I am hopeful. Jess and I have been through hell with this and to be able to write this post gives me great joy. You can imagine, of course, how Jess feels as well. The outlook of our life has done a 180 since a year ago.
Going through this had already given me a different perspective on life. How could it not? When your days seem suddenly numbered, it cannot help but create a seismic shift in how you see, approach, and understand life. But now, with this incredible news, I also feel like I have a renewed lease on life. I feel like the shroud has been pulled away from my lantern and my fire continues to burn....brighter and stronger and, like the phoenix, Jess and I emerge from the ashes of this dark journey.
Hug the people you love. Book that trip you've been talking about. Dive into that new hobby you've been thinking about. Take lessons. Learn a new language. Treat yourself to that thing you've been hemming and hawing over. Pick up a new book. Paint something. Plant flowers. Soak in the stars. Smile more. Love widely. Take risks. Live like the phoenix - majestic, soaring, and boldly and brightly burning.
Slainte, friends! Skol. Cheers!
-j